The follow-up after a first date is rarely as simple as: “I like you, I had fun, let’s get together again.” There are layers of meaning in texts to unpack, not to mention timing: who reaches out first and how quickly does the other person respond? It can all feel like a giant chess match.
Either party can play coy because a) They don’t want to look too eager/desperate and b) They’re not sure how the other person feels, but there are a number of cues that can confirm your date is going swimmingly.
Wanting More One-on-One Time
When your date wants to spend time with you alone instead of calling in backup for a group date, it likely means that he’s comfortable around you and wants to spend more time getting to know you. “One tactic to combat a boring date,” he says, “is calling in ‘reinforcement’ friends” as social buffers.
Extending the Date
Suggesting something (other than going back to someone’s place) after dinner is a solid indication that your date’s asking for an encore. If they’re willing to extend the date past the “easy out” first location of a bar or coffee shop, that’s a good sign.
Suggesting *Another* Date
A common time to suggest another date is at the end of the first one. Some may do this as a friendly gesture before making a quick exit, but it can’t be bad if your date is enthusiastic enough to suggest a second meet-up. They just have to make good on their word.
The Friendly Follow-Up Right After You Say Good-bye
A good sign that a date went *really* well, is when someone giddily follows up after a date to let you know they had a great time without waiting around. The alternative: “If I’m not interested after the date, I’ll head straight home and begin my process of fading out of this girl’s life (following up is not part of that process).” Of course, not hearing back right away isn’t a definite rejection, but the excitement of a speedy follow-up message speaks for itself.
When you start dating someone and haven’t established exclusivity, it’s always important to measure signs that the other person is as on-board as you are. This could mean making regular conversation or establishing dates at a consistent frequency.